Our sufferings are interlinked with externalities. In short, on things or circumstances which are not in our control.
Our human mind and our ego seek validation, holds grudges and unmet desires. In most of the occasion, it puts importance on externalities.
How many days and hours; we have wasted on what others would think about us. How many days and hours; we wasted in mending a broken relationship. How much we have suffered because of others cheating with us in life, business.
Some would say: we could have been more aware, true. But still, does it guarantee the avoidance of pain and suffering?