life

A lot many friends of mine think my view of seeing life is very pessimistic. I tend to disagree; I have read Arthur Schopenhauer and his philosophy of Pessimism. But at the same time, I do like the teachings of believe in Diogenes, the cynic philosopher, and Epictetus, the slave stoic philosopher. I like friends and indulging in pleasure too, getting lost and daydreaming that comes to the Epicurean way of living.

In short, our life is a memory we create, people we indulge with, and above all, it is about our thoughts and the way we see everything from within.

In reality, it is painful and full of uncertainties. Your loved one will die any minute; you will be out of a job any day. Your kid or relatives will throw you out of house and wealth.

I keep this quote of Epictetus very close to myself:

“Some things are in our control and others not. Things in our control are opinion, pursuit, desire, aversion, and, in a word, whatever are our own actions. Things not in our control are body, property, reputation, command, and, in one word, whatever are not our actions. The things in our control are by nature free, unrestrained, unhindered; but those not in our control are weak, slavish, restrained, belonging to others. Remember, then, that if you suppose that things which are slavish by nature are also free and that what belongs to others is your own, then you will be hindered. You will lament, you will be disturbed, and you will find fault both with gods and men. But if you suppose that only to be your own which is your own, and what belongs to others such as it really is, then no one will ever compel you or restrain you. Further, you will find fault with no one or accuse no one. You will do nothing against your will. No one will hurt you, you will have no enemies, and you not be harmed.”

Life is a utopia in movies, fiction, Instagram, or other social media platforms.

advice

Finding who you are from within, one piece of advice I have been telling everyone. It is easy to get lost in the external world or fall prey to the world shown by society.

As Socrates said: acquiring self-knowledge and what J Krishnamurti said: finding who you are. These are not just philosophical sayings but something worth spending time on.

It will help you with a purpose in life, a soulmate, or work that keeps you always energized. Spend more time questioning yourself, your beliefs, likes, dislikes, vices, virtues. No one from outside can help you with it.

Bhujia Barons

I picked Bhujia Barons because I have been snacking Haldiram‘s for over a decade now. The author has not done enough justice to the story. I felt like reading some newspaper article.

The book is about the origin of the brand Halidirams from Bikaner and branching out laters in India Nagpur, Kolkata, and Delhi. 

Like any family business book talks about:

  • Legacy of a secret recipe.
  • Pain and hard work.
  • Respect for elders
  • Running a debt free, low-risk business.
  • Treating customers above everything else.

It also talks about how ego, aspirations resulted in a collision and further division among the family members. The Kolkata family of Haldiram’s showed as most aspirating, ruthless, breaking the law, bribing, etc. 

I don’t think the book has enough substance. It could have been a single long-form post or investigative piece.

development

I just returned from my hometown, a small district on the border of Nepal named Sitamarhi. The nearest airport for us was Patna, 85-90 km and, in past, it would take 5-6 hours to reach to Patna airport. The roads were unmaintained and, it had more potholes than roads. During monsoons, we had to be at the mercy of boatmen. They would demand as much they liked for crossing sides and at times let you sink with you and motorbike in the middle of a river.

Electricity was like monsoon flashes of lightning for us. Most of us grew up reading in the kerosene lamps and, in later years, there were generator mafia’s charging per point that can be a light bulb or fan. To my disbelief, there was a minuscule power-cut. Once in the last seven days for less than half an hour.

I heard stories firsthand about how an alcohol ban and a small initiative like giving a bicycle to a girl child has transformed things. Any many instances, a sister would carry their young brother as well to school in a pillion. Some of those girls are full-time government employees, teachers, because of this little initiative. On the way, I saw dozens of girls in clusters going to school, and I felt so good. The cynic me would say, why not build proper school neat the house, so no need to cycle that far.

This time I took my flight from the newly built Darbhanga airport. It reduced my trip time significantly. It was a small outing for my parents instead of tired, the mad rush for catching the flight. I saw happiness, hope, and energy in co-passengers, and many of them traveling for the first time, returning to work in Bangalore, paid by their managers. It was like a newborn’s joy in seeing the light or eating sweets for the first time.

It is easy to be a critique of the system, government, and society. This world is a fucked up place, and it gives us more reason to work ass off and make it better. Being an armchair expert or keyboard worrier on social media is the easiest thing one can do. The hard thing is doing a bit from our side and fixing things in our control.

As a country, each one has its challenges, and the overall world is working towards getting better.

We all have strong opinions, likes, and dislikes.

It boils down to :
Desh to wahi hai bus siyasatdaar badalte rahte hai, unke saath mahul aur unke numindee.

everything

It is easy to get lost in everything. Last few hours, I have been venting over how oligarchs are making us pay for their loot. I made my tax payment today.

In the last 10 mins, I realized I wasted the last few hours. It is not something I can fight waste my time over. I have a few things in my control; I should focus on them.

I can’t fuck my brain over everything. There is limited time; I have my known battle, and I should focus on fighting it. I was stupid, ended up becoming a keyboard worrier.

different

This time it’s different. Our media likes to publish now and then about the pandemic, pollution, or recession. We are told how our world is falling apart and, we should be prepared to build our own Noah’s Arch.

We, humans, thrive on uncertainty. The dinosaurs disappeared, pandemic came, world war happened, we bounced back from it all and moved on.

Our belief that we will evolve, move on, get better, learn from past mistakes has kept the civilization thriving for all these years.

Our problems might be different, an alien in the future or batteling with machines or zoonotic. We will still get over those and thrive; it makes us different from the animal kingdom.

feed

You can’t force-feed a donkey and make them a racehorse. The sooner we understand it, the better it will be for us. Knowing our blind spot and circle of competence can change the way we see our life and work.

We are living in a world where externalities are governing us, the decisions of our life. We do engineering because parents wanted it, we get married soon cos society forced upon us.

There is a constant seeking to be one among everyone in this glittery society, is that feeding this on us? We are faking ourselves, pushing harder, living a miserable life?

Every year billions $$ worth of books are printed and shoved on us about how you can do or achieve anything. You can master, be great at anything with your 10,000 hours of dedication. How much of these are far from the truth?

Are we weaponizing or sedating our generations with the gospel of optimism at the same time blinding them with education loans, debt, and glitters?

alcohol

Why do we need alcohol to open up? I was with friends last evening and, one of the things they were complaining that I have so much to hide as I am not drunk. I assured that I am always naked with or without alcohol. Those who are closer to me know when being fucked or when I am super happy.

I don’t understand this ritual of getting drunk to open up. What are we carrying or hiding within subconsciously which can come out after alcohol consumption? I find it completely stupid.

I had a liter plus beer last night after four years for my friends to gauge how much alcohol changed me. The beer tasted like shit and yes I am happy not drinking it mostly because of stupidity and health reasons.

zindgi

Apni zindgi ko kyun koste hai hum itna? Kyun zindgi jee lete hai zazbatoo aur zilatoo me? Apni zindgi khud ki hote hoye bihi hum kyun ho jate hai gulaam itna auroo ke uper?

Kya hai ye bebasi, lachari, tanhai? Ye sab zindgi ka hissa he to hain. Kyun nahi ziye zate hai hai zindgi ko zindadilii se?

Lessons to lead by

In the last chapter of the book, The ride of a lifetime, Robert Iger shares his life lessons. I am adding limited ones I could resonate well, read the book for the rest others :

  • Great talents tell great stories.
  • Innovate or die.
  • Avoid mediocrity 
  • Take responsibility when you screw up.
  • Treat everyone with fairness and empathy.
  • Strive for integrity
  • Value ability more than experience 
  • Ask questions
  • Don’t start negatively and, don’t start small.
  • Don’t be in the business of playing it safe.
  • Don’t let ambition get ahead of the opportunity.
  • Gauge opportunity cost
  • People and the quality of the product is the sum total of companies reputation.
  • Avoid micromanagement
  • Lead with courage, not fear
  • You can’t communicate pessimism to the people around you. It’s ruinous to morale. No one wants to follow a pessimist.
  • Pessimism leads to paranoia, which leads to defensiveness, which leads to risk aversion. 
  • You have to communicate priority clearly and repeatedly.
  • Optimism emerges from faith in yourself and in the people who work with you.
  • It should be about the future, not the past.
  • Treating others well is an undervalued currency, especially in tough negotiations.
  • If you are in the business of making something, be in the business of making something great.