JOMO

I have known Vinay for over 15 years now. He has been around in the thick and thin phase of my life. We met after some time today. I was busy all this while, in one or the other things that kept cropping up.

The more we spoke, the more I realized how amazing it is to talk to friends about things other than work and life. This random conversation where we are not judging ourselves or not showcasing our aspirations. It is perfect gold.

The rate race, seeking validation from others, and following others’ paths are few things neither of us has pursued in our life. In short, we are a nutcase. But these catchups make us realize the power of JOMO came up, the joy of missing out.

Free

I am a sucker for freedom and dislike being a caged bird under some command or doctrine. Our society and upbringing do a lot to us during our growth and shape our worldview. How we act, react comes from our past experiences.

One of the conversations I frequently keep listening to and discussing is Love, a multi trillion dollars industry. From books to perfumes to cookies to makeup, we have someone guiding our choices. I find all this stupid and, that is when the conversation gets heated.

We seek validation, incentive, and recognization and, Love is no different. It has ended up being a style statement. GenZ makes or breaks on Instagram and, idiot box celebrities make most Hollywood careers teaching how to Ignite Love on TikTok.

In this mumbo jumbo, we have forgotten about the core of trust, belief, commitment and freedom. A relationship needs these pillars before what is sold.

David

As early-stage startup founders, we are always like David’s in the battle with many Goliaths. A laughing stock, underdog, and with few believers. A very few crazy heads, after all, side with the ship sailing against the tide.

Founders have a huge responsibility to go after existing players, win trust from engineers, customers, and everyone around us. It is a constant battle and, founders are the underdogs. The journey has many twists and turns, but in the end, what makes it exciting is the conviction of the founder and constant self-belief.

 Rejection is part of this startup journey. As long as we have such a few co-passengers as mentors, believers in this entrepreneurship journey, taking on Goliath is super simple. 

In the end, Goliath lost more than David because he was a favorite and default. 

As a founder, keeping heads down, delighting those early believers. The only things which matter in this battle. 

Closure

Why do some people move away without proper closure, be it in a job or relationship? Is it to keep their high moral ground or avoid sulking? Are they too scared to accept the reality?

With the limited time allocated to us, how are they doing justice to their counterparts? Every relationship has multiple actors and having a proper closure is logical for both parties.

I am seeing this time and again in both and relationships these days. People walk away overnight without giving reasons and leave with unending expectations.

Principles

Principle by Ray Dalio talks about keeping a set of algorithms, mental models, or life principles. The autobiography of Benjamin Franklin with a daily checklist of vice and virtues. It has added some clarity to my life and, life is less miserable.

All I am trying to do is to stay sane. Life is limited and mostly painful. When we have our set of principles, it makes things simpler, like an algorithm of if-else. On occasions, it results in losing a sales deal or friends or loved ones. But in the end, it is my life and, I cannot drag it or live it just for fitting in a bucket.

We, humans, are born with emotions and, it makes us unique in the animal kingdom. Our emotions come with baggage. The best way to live with emotions is to know what and what-not is right or part of our principles.

makeup

The grooming industry is hitting an all-time high, with companies going public and creating buzz. Going by some friends, a good chunk of money they spend on beautifying themselves.

We are how we project outwards to the world. Fake it till you make it is the sales and leadership jargon thrown every day. We have to look good, presentable, and carry along well.

Most of us forget about grooming within. Spending time with ourselves, observing our thoughts, and accepting who we are. What about spending a few hours and reading, spending time with loved ones or working out, running, swimming.

We want to look good, be presentable to the external world. We are running for acceptance from the outside. At the same time, we have forgotten about who we are within.

The makeup, look, age and, Instagram followers will fade with time. Our thoughts, consciousness we will carry till we die. Think about it.

Originality

There are testing times in our lives and, solutions come down to staying sane and holding together the originality.

Will it be good or virtuous to become someone you are not because a doctrine, pact, or relationship requires you to be? How can you give the best of yourself after the transformation?

It is easy to follow or chase purpose, life, money, or partner by staying sane. Not by becoming who you are not, keeping originality intact.

Then there will be a few who will come chasing and telling you to understand the situation or be flexible or keep a growth mindset. All on account of having you act as who you are not. It will be fruitful in the short term but, long-term consequences will erode you.

Perfect

We chase perfection. Be it profession, possession, or relationships. This quest ends up being a curse or some burden.

The definition of perfection is governed by society or someone else and, we are chasing it. The more we fail towards achieving it, the more distracted from reality.

Humans are animals and, the hyper-competitive world is adding more fuel to fire. We have stopped counting small joys and ending up as gladiators for life.

Race

Thanks to Capitalism and society’s modern outlook. Our priorities have changed swiftly. It is all about acing in a career at any cost. The best job, best professional achievement. But at what cost? Leaving personal life, family around? Why can we not have both together? We peak at our professional prime and, personnel life gets erased. We live with pets, regular therapies, and app for finding a soulmate.

I was talking to an elderly couple last week at hills. They were like: we took care of personal life first and then sorted everything else. It would come as a surprise to most of us. We will laugh at their limited mindset and living in the past. Some others would blame them for being lazy ass living in a hut and producing babies to work in their fields.

monster

Are we humans or monsters? I don’t know. But most of us are living with an anger balloon. We carry our supreme ego. We want to be the best and correct with everything. A waiter is treated like trash for his mistake. A cab driver gets treated like a robot. We have taken our gardener or cook for granted. Our anger and rage on them do more harm to ourselves than anyone else.

What has gone wrong? Why have we turned into such a monster?