feed

You can’t force-feed a donkey and make them a racehorse. The sooner we understand it, the better it will be for us. Knowing our blind spot and circle of competence can change the way we see our life and work.

We are living in a world where externalities are governing us, the decisions of our life. We do engineering because parents wanted it, we get married soon cos society forced upon us.

There is a constant seeking to be one among everyone in this glittery society, is that feeding this on us? We are faking ourselves, pushing harder, living a miserable life?

Every year billions $$ worth of books are printed and shoved on us about how you can do or achieve anything. You can master, be great at anything with your 10,000 hours of dedication. How much of these are far from the truth?

Are we weaponizing or sedating our generations with the gospel of optimism at the same time blinding them with education loans, debt, and glitters?

alcohol

Why do we need alcohol to open up? I was with friends last evening and, one of the things they were complaining that I have so much to hide as I am not drunk. I assured that I am always naked with or without alcohol. Those who are closer to me know when being fucked or when I am super happy.

I don’t understand this ritual of getting drunk to open up. What are we carrying or hiding within subconsciously which can come out after alcohol consumption? I find it completely stupid.

I had a liter plus beer last night after four years for my friends to gauge how much alcohol changed me. The beer tasted like shit and yes I am happy not drinking it mostly because of stupidity and health reasons.

zindgi

Apni zindgi ko kyun koste hai hum itna? Kyun zindgi jee lete hai zazbatoo aur zilatoo me? Apni zindgi khud ki hote hoye bihi hum kyun ho jate hai gulaam itna auroo ke uper?

Kya hai ye bebasi, lachari, tanhai? Ye sab zindgi ka hissa he to hain. Kyun nahi ziye zate hai hai zindgi ko zindadilii se?

Lessons to lead by

In the last chapter of the book, The ride of a lifetime, Robert Iger shares his life lessons. I am adding limited ones I could resonate well, read the book for the rest others :

  • Great talents tell great stories.
  • Innovate or die.
  • Avoid mediocrity 
  • Take responsibility when you screw up.
  • Treat everyone with fairness and empathy.
  • Strive for integrity
  • Value ability more than experience 
  • Ask questions
  • Don’t start negatively and, don’t start small.
  • Don’t be in the business of playing it safe.
  • Don’t let ambition get ahead of the opportunity.
  • Gauge opportunity cost
  • People and the quality of the product is the sum total of companies reputation.
  • Avoid micromanagement
  • Lead with courage, not fear
  • You can’t communicate pessimism to the people around you. It’s ruinous to morale. No one wants to follow a pessimist.
  • Pessimism leads to paranoia, which leads to defensiveness, which leads to risk aversion. 
  • You have to communicate priority clearly and repeatedly.
  • Optimism emerges from faith in yourself and in the people who work with you.
  • It should be about the future, not the past.
  • Treating others well is an undervalued currency, especially in tough negotiations.
  • If you are in the business of making something, be in the business of making something great.

creative

Indians are not creative. They under-utilize the creative brain.

Are we Indians not creative. Or is it because we are a developing economy and we have to work harder than our counterparts from the developed world for end meets?

When our basic necessity is not with us, how will we think or be creative? When everyday challenges are about surviving. If it is about fulfilling parents’ and society’s checklist: buying a house, getting married, or pay a loan. Who will have time for creativity or using the left brain?

Raja Ravi Verma, Tagore, and many others had to least worry about money. Otherwise, we would have never gotten the best of theirs.

How many millions of Indians kill their creativity or underutilize our left brain because, in the end, we have to grind day in and out to stay afloat?

You have to take care of your basic needs before becoming a scholar, philosopher, painter, etc.

weakness

Be strong; do not show your weakness. But why? Why can’t we be vulnerable? Why do we have to talk to a faceless therapist about what is fucking us up from inside?

We have lived in a close-knit since eternity, what happened to us now? We got all it takes to make: wealth, social status, home, family, and we are stressed scared?

Our forefathers lived in more miserable conditions. Life expectancy was low. They lived happily; they had a sense of togetherness and bonding.

Fast forward now, we have all the luxury of the world, but we are empty. We don’t have that support group who will be there for you, who accepts your vulnerability, and whom you can hug, cry, share your failures, and seek advice.

We have everything in abundance and, still, we are empty, dying more painfully every day.

spoonfeed

Is it our culture, education system, or society that craves newcomers for being spoonfed or micromanaged? In my limited experience, I have seen most dislike in figuring out things: be it with life decisions, education, skill acquisition, or work.

I have been interviewing candidates for various roles in the last few months, and most of the newcomers(not all) expected a big team, organization, or hand-holding for their growth and progress.

After four years of engineering, design degree, and living in this world for 20 plus years, why would one need to be spoonfed? Is it because of our society, parents who have kept us in a protected environment and hindered our decision making? Our independent thinking never grew?

With the emergence of the internet and the availability of learning materials, a student in Vietnam or tier 4 city in India is no different. They can acquire the same skillset as any kid sitting in the developed world.
What differentiates and hiders us is: we lack independent thinking and a decision making attitude. We look for outsiders for appreciation and acceptance.

The virtue of being independent, owing our life needs to be given by parents, society, and the education system from early on. We need to fix it else; we will continue living in the dark ages behind the developed world and future generations.

PS: My sample size is small, so I can be biased with my observation and will be happy to be wrong. It means our country’s youth is growing and we have a better future ahead. 🙂

right

A leader’s job is not to be right. Their job is to ensure an organization is working together as an operating system. They have to ensure that the team is motivated and aware of overall milestones and companies vision.

It is the team and togetherness which guarantees any organization’s success. The cult leadership creates a toxic culture, unexpected deliverables, and division.

As a leader, if you fuck up, own it.
As a leader, if you don’t know something, accept it.
As a leader, if things are not going the way it should, be honest.

On Leadership, Robert Iger

Robert Iger is executive chairman of Walt Disney and was formally CEO of the company. In his book: The Ride of his Lifetime, he talks about his leadership principles. 

 Robert’s shared his leadership principles in the book’s prologue. 

  • Optimism 
  • Courage
  • Focus
  • Decisiveness
  • Curiosity 
  • Fairness
  • Thoughtfulness
  • Authenticity 
  • Integrity
  • The relentless pursuit of perfection 

I let you all craft meaning for these terms related to your operating dynamics. I will add the subsequent post as I got through the book. Again it was Karthik‘s recommendation for this book. 🙂 

past

How much our past matters? I was going through photograph dumps, notes, scribbles. We change with time; Our priority, People, and the journey keep moving. I am barely in touch with my school and college friends. I am hardly in touch with folks from my first job.

At the same time, I have noticed our brain starts crafting patterns, likes, and aversions. It could be of a place, people, or what we eat, habits.

I have seen alcoholics, addicts turning sober in their latter half of life and reverse as well.

So how much does the past matter?
It depends on how we shape the journey of our life. Past learning has to guide for a positive future.

Our life is like a journey with a collection of experiences, relationships, and actions. We are humans; we cannot be perfect and logical as Spock. It is okay to move on.