koolhead17
Why are we so attached to our loved ones? So that their demise or parting off leaves a vacuum in our life?
Can we not live in reality, knowing nothing is permanent? Can we not be rational and live a life without attaching ourselves to someone or something? Can we not live in a moment and giving best efforts and making it count? Why do we have to live in such pain?
Are we humans born to live a miserable life because of attachment?
What matters to us depends on how we see the world.
What matters is our attitude.
What matters is how true we to ourselves.
What matters is our peace of mind.
What matters is the company of close friends.
What matters is the believers out there to hold you when you fail.
What matters is having a coach or mentor to show you the path, kick you when you are losing focus.
What matters is making use of available resources to their best.
What matters is being empathetic and treating everyone with love and respect.
What matters is seeing them succeed, live happily, who gave away the precious time of their life on a mutual vision and roadmap.
What matters is healthy parents, loved ones mentally and physically.
Does anything else really matter?
I spent Holi, the festival of colors, after a decade at my hometown. The days with mom-dad made me wander in the past. I watched kids playing with colors, throwing balloons at each other, and laughing. It felt very nostalgic.
I could see 20 years younger myself participating with that crown, laughing and dancing, and playing with my school friends. I spoke to all my friends and shared those pictures, and laughed about our past.
Later in the evening, papa took me to the village to pray to our ancestral god(kuldevta). It was like visiting back in time and imagining my grandma preparing all foods and other savories to welcome guests. I remember how impatient she would get if there would be any delay in cooking. The village male would take out julush(possession), beating drums, playing sankh, and dancing intoxicated on bhang.
Later when I walked around the mango fields, it reminded me of summers as mango tree was full of manjjar(flowers) and some with tikola(baby mangoes). Our summer holidays meant running at those orchids, aiming at the kisanbhog mango, and collecting them. They would taste super sweet when raw and later walking in the paddy fields mimicking koyal(cuckoo) or other birds dancing and intimidating them. Our day would end bathing naked, throwing sands at each other at boarding pumps meant to irrigate the paddy fields. We were break free, less conditioned, and innocent.
While returning, we stopped at the paan shop run by Rajkumar uncle. He has been running it for over 40 years. He made 1st paan for me, AFAIK. While papa was exchanging pleasantries, I walked to the bazaar looking at farmers selling vegetables from their farms. I purchased some local saag(spinach).
Am I acting dumb or being too nostalgic?
We are all born narcissists. Some a little while others a lot. Our desire is to be loved and listened to. Some get angry, pensive when in a group, family, relationship others start getting all the focus and importance.
On the scale of narcissism, one does the destruction. If you are or people are you are above the threshold, you or your organization is screwed. As an employee, team member, or partner, you have a tough life ahead.
The world is not a utopia and, an organization runs with a group of people. We all have our own opinions, beliefs. We work together for the greater good: the success of the organization.
It means we will be keeping our differences, sail through, and progress. It is like a strong opinion weakly held. We should not demonize anyone for their differences but look for the greater good. Our differences do not make others get less of our respect. Our differences are because of our way of seeing the world.
I keep hearing and sometimes argue over specifications, be it a product or design. We have their specific standards or best practices defined. For first-time users and emerging demography, these standards might not hold.
I believe in minimalism (thanks to AB & minio) and the “don’t make me think” paradigm. At times we have to move beyond these philosophies or standards and keep user empathy on top.
Vikas was eight years old when his father passed away in a road accident. Born in a lower-middle-class family with no income, his mother ended up working at houses in a nearby colony as a cleaner. She worked hard and, Vikas continued studying at the English medium school. He was among the class toppers. Poverty did not defeat his aspirations or desire for a better life.
Vikas made the best of everything and, his mother was the world for him. They had no one else to look after. That is the price one pays after inter-caste marriage: either you are poisoned, beaten to death, or forgotten by the parents.
It was the last week of August when Monsoon was at its peak before departure. The non-stop rain lasted for over a week. Most had the luxury to stay at home but not Vikas’s mother. She had to go clean houses for those malkins(housewives). It resulted in mild fever and cough. As time progressed, it ended up being severe. With the limited knowledge and money Vikas had, the nearby drugstore near his home was the best he could afford. His mother’s condition kept falling before she took her last breath.
It was all the malkins(housewives) who helped him with the last rites. Time flew from day to week to month but, the loss of a mother continued: Vikas was an orphan and restored to weed and alcohol consumption.
One night at the chai shop, he met half a dozen sadhus, The ascetic members of our society. They were headed back to Mathura. It was the conversation or aura; Vikas packed his back and joined in their journey, leaving the worldly pleasures.
Vikas is mahant now at a matha in Mathura. It took him 12 years. He wanted to become a doctor and serve the poor, but the future had some other plans for him.
Why are we so stressed and less in confidence? Is it because of the treadmill of consumerism? Or is it because we are living in a divided world. The world where there is no equality or level playing field?
We can see this in a city itself, one part has no water, electricity and living in past while other is competing with silicon valley. Whose fault or luck is it to be born in a wealthy or poor? Does it not define the journey of life?
When it is all about survival, how will one think about happiness or confidence? The way our county moving, we will see and hear more and more of this occurrence.
Our media likes to portray rags to rich stories and limelight about the level playing field.
But can we not be stressed or lack confidence? I would say we can, only if we know what we don’t want and learn to say No.
Do we not own our actions? Why do we have to blame others for our failures and success all through ourselves? Why can’t we accept our mistakes and learn from them? Is it more to do with our ego?
These are some simple thoughts added after reading: think again by Adam Grant.