phase

The early ’20s is a difficult phase of everyone’s life. While we are figuring out, society is at us guiding what we should do. Be it our parents, elderly siblings, or parents. At the same time, our body and brain are juggling with the hormonal changes.

From building a career to falling in love everything happens at this age. This is the golden moment of our life. This period shapes our future.

With the advancement in science and technology. We are getting better and youngsters are learning about every aspect of their life. But still, a lot is on our own shoulder.

ideology

Why do we have to shove our ideology to family or peers? People who are closer to us can be independent with their world view. Why do we have to force our belief?

We want to see our peers, family progressing in their life. Progress should happen in all realms apart from monetary, education. Having independent, free thinkers with their way of seeing the world will be a better company.

We, humans, thrive in society. Likeability and respect are jewels. In 2020, we have moved beyond living in a tribe. We have information on plenty. What we need more is an independent way of thinking, not following the herd.

relationship

Breakup seems like the biggest epidemic of our modern civilization. Social media, smartphones, and instant gratification have increased it further. Everyone goes through it with mixed feelings.

The reason for moving on:

  • Our unmet expectations
  • Being cheated
  • Letting our happiness in the hand of others
  • Peer pressure
  • Change of mind or life’s priority

The human desire for likability and reproduction makes us seek for the other half. A huge trillion dollar market makes the best from it. Best selling fiction and Hollywood flicks are selling the utopia of true love.

How difficult it is to live life on our own terms, not letting our fate, happiness in the hand of one individual? How difficult it is to not fall for herd mentality, relax, and take time before venturing? 

spark

How many great things have happened in your life, the challenges you took because someone was out there cheering you up? As much as we seek self-knowledge, we need people around us. People who believe in us or those make us go the extra mile. They fuel spark in you. I have been fortunate to have some such incidents be it starting up, doodling, writing every day, or having a healthy lifestyle. In all these intervals, I had my friends fueling those spark.

You are defined by the company of friends, pick them wisely. They will be your shining star and bring a spark in your life.

I am halfway through my life, I am optimistic about meeting many more friends who will help me in becoming a better version of me.

groupthink

How many ideas, innovation, and projects got killed because of groupthink? How many times the assembled crowd made a mockery of the skeptic?

Our organizational system is hierarchical, like christ and his followers. No one dare question the leader and worship him/her and their ideas. If by chance once in a while someone went questioning the ideology, they became an infidel.

Running an organization and innovation requires seeing every side of the coin. Ingroup bias or groupthink affects radical openness. It results in class creation: You fresher, STFU. We know more than you.

Everyone likes sailing with a course of water, very few challenges the unknown. Success depends on knowing all odds and moving beyond groupthink.

We have to avoid falling for CEO disease.

Sugarcoating

Sugarcoating sucks. We should be very open and honest with giving feedback. Be it your kid, partner you have to give honest feedback. It does more wonders and helps in growing and getting better.

My product journey has made me realize users avoid giving honest feedback. They don’t want to hurt you or have not used your product.

Be it life or business, this honest feedback has made me a better person. No bullshit feedback.

Emotion

One thing which differentiates us from Robots is Our emotion. Emotions play a key role in how we respond to challenges. Our emotions can make or break our relationship or formal alliance. We are not Socrates to remain logical or rational on all occasions.

Emotional outbursts lead to an argument and act as a sign of incompetence or weakness.

On a receiving end one should deal it with empathy and care. Understanding the core issue for the outburst can help. Listening others without arguing also clears things.

Having a clear picture and end goal of working together and navigating through emotional outburst can be comforting.

magic

Carol S. Dweck, author of Mindset has given intellectuals a whistle. I had my share last night, I heard Growth Mindset over a dozen times on a call.

Mindset
Growth: Work hard, learn new things, and grow.
Fixed: Don’t work hard, stay as you are, and lose the competition.

Malcolm Gladwell wrote Outliers on the research paper of K. Anders Ericsson. It takes 1000 hours of hard work to master anything.

Angela Duckworth in her book Grit talks on the similar lines. If you want something: don’t give up and work hard.

Angela Duckworth, Malcolm Gladwell, and Carol S. Dweck are talking about the same thing. All 3 of them are psychologists and made millions selling their books.

The good old wisdom of Charlie Munger talks about Incentives. I feel without incentive, which can be internal or external reading these books won’t help. Hence focus on your incentive first and magic will happen in your life.