koolhead17
I have read since childhood: The best defense is a good offense.
With age and experience, I have modified this: The best defense avoidance.
Some situations in life are best left and avoided.
Your friend is backbiting, fight or completely avoid him/her.
Your landlord is greedy, avoid getting mad at him. Change your house.
Your founder is lying to you, paying himself more while you are working for peanuts. What can you do, avoid and get another job?
We are seeking approval from externals. This urge of seeking approval is hindering our creativity.
In every aspect of our life, we are craving it.
Blog posts are a source for channeling individuality, not page-views.
What one wears has more to do with his or her comfort, not what others say.
An entrepreneur should focus on delighting their customers. But some seeks for approval from investors, friends, and media.
This approval-seeking tendency derails us from being real us or what we are building.
Passion is a buzzword. It comes in most of my conversations with founders and friends in courtship. Passion is a valued currency in capitalism. We are selling it to each other.
I remember being passionate about many things. With experience, I have come to realize that passion and anger go hand in hand. The more passionate we are, the more is our obsession for success. Passion fuels the attitude for: “no room for failures.”
I don’t like being passionate about anything in my life. I am a believer of process and system. It keeps me sane and blood pressure in check.
I spend sometime on Sunday at Lalbagh botanical garden. It forms part of old Bangalore. In a crowded metro like Bangalore, it is an absolute delight. It has a big walking trail, rose garden, lake, nursery beside many other things.
It is a world on its own. I see people running or walking and various yoga groups or runners clubs training. Parents training their kids, teaching them how to walk, holding their hands. The environment is buzzing, laughter all around. I met a group of retired seniors and they mentioned that this group has been meeting daily for many decades. I see many families carrying food with them, sitting relaxed and having a picnic. There are many others picking flowers or herbs fallen from trees.
I see many people buying fruits and vegetables. Some queued for juice the juice to quench their thirst. Many NGO’s with doctors and machines are conducting free health camps. I saw eye camp and free blood pressure checkups
Lalbagh not limited to senior citizens or families. It is a common hangout for couples, youngsters. I am assuming it is not limited to their social media or selfie postings. Lalbagh is a great venue for a post or pre-wedding shoots.
The lakeside is a delight for bird watchers and photographers. I see There some people feeding ducks and fishes. Lalbagh is abundant with various flora and fauna. I have seen many distinct species of butterflies, plants, and insects. The chirping of birds is a relief to my eardrums, for a change no honks. Sometime in the middle of the day, the loud insect noise makes me feel am in some jungle. Squirrels are the free soul of Lalbagh, I have never seen them so independent anywhere else. The Lotus pond and created waterfall is a spectacular view.
I will continue visiting Lalbagh on my Sunday. Another good feeling I have being here is that the place is free from any divide. I imagine it is Central Park equal for Bangalore.
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Why is appearance important?
Why does it play such a role in our society?
One has to look good or present him/her well.
Appearance is the first criteria for acceptance and rejection.
Why are we judged on our looks or what we are wearing without uttering a word?
Eat to please thyself, but dress to please others.
— Benjamin Franklin
A smart guy like Benjamin Franklin also advocated for it. 🙁
Is it our laziness or the unlimited availability which resulted in this?
We have multi-billion cosmetics and grooming industry reaping benefits of human vulnerability. Loaded with advertisements and counseling, they are telling us what to wear and apply to our skin.
Why can’t there be a world which recognizes humans as we are? Why do we have to get into the zone of looking or wearing like someone?
Your beard, your shorts, and an unironed T-shirt has no place here.
Diogenes must be laughing from above seeing all this.
What keeps us going? What keeps us sane? What drives us to wake up every morning, live our day to its best? There are many factors which shape us. These factors differentiate us from other humans.
Being a guinea pig myself, spending a lot of time tinkering I have found some clue.
They are:
* Food
* Exercise
* Music
* Reading
* Friends, company of people.
* Individual living philosophy.
I will write on each over coming days. I will relate them with its impact on me.
We all need help. Asking for help is not a sign of fear. Our life is not a self-help book. We should reap most from our circle of competence.
Asking for help is wise, it saves your time. You get expert in that specific domain telling you what and how about it.
Some of us read and fell for 10000 hours ritual, which made the author rich.
Why do we have to fake it and not seek help?
Is our ego so important?
What about the life of people and co-workers we are leading?
Are we not cheating on them?
Seeking help is not about ego depletion or guilt ride. It’s about holding the hand of a perfectionist and getting a job done.
In 2018, being anonymous is a crime. Everyone wants your identity, even the government.
Your tiny little phone keeps track of every single minute of your movement. Then you have applications like Tinder, Uber and others. All whose service depends on location.
I have no clue if it is good or bad. I have nothing to hide.
While most of us like our identity, selfie, and social sharing. Some of us are not comfortable with it. The reason can be the social barometer and glorification of our youth or skin color.
This group is intelligent, smart and open-minded. Still, there is a big division.
Why is such a division?
Are we the ones responsible for it?
Have we made them anonymous?
Why is not using social media uncool?
The constant urge of updating our whereabouts is cool?
Are we more lonely than before by being bolder?
I have no answers.
We plan about our life, future, career, marriage.
Some of it goes as expected while most does not.
Some of us celebrate out of the hits and move on with the misses. They are a happy lot, more realistic.
Many of us feel sad and blame our luck. We blame others.
Why do we blame and become miserable when things do not go as planned?
Our life has limited time, why can’t we move on and learn from our failed plans?
Is there any template available to be Successful? I know many have written in length and some made worth fortune on the topic.
But what exactly is a success?
* Finding a soulmate?
* A billion dollar exit?
* Being right in predicting Black Swan occurrence?
Socrates drank hemlock and lived on a life seeking self-knowledge.
Plato talks about know thyself.
Epictetus says a man should live in accordance with nature.
Is success all about being right with predictions, bets. Is fast-paced communication affecting it? Has our decision-making window shrunk? Have we become biased and prejudiced?
How many of fallen victim for :
* Everyone is watching X on Netflix. It must be good. It turns out a shit show.
* As an investor, everyone is investing in that hot idea and a passionate founder.
* Friends booked a flat and I should follow them.
* You have crossed 30, get married or you will die single.
* You need to be working 18 hours and be passionate. That will make you succeed.
Tata and Reliance would have had the different fate in Whatsapp, Quora or Twitter era? Entire would have advised Jamsetji Tata or Dhirubhai Ambani what to do to become successful.
I doubt they would have wasted time listening to startup podcasts. I doubt they have wasted time reading Steve blank, Ben Horowitz, Tim Ferris, Paul Graham or Peter Thiel.
Or was it sharp focus, perseverance, persistence, some luck, close friends and customers? Or was it the customers and users who believed in them? Or were they solving a real problem and delighting their users?
What made them successful?